When our kids are little, we're so careful to shelter them from things we deem not child friendly. We're careful how we speak, so that they don't copy our bad language or inappropriate talk. We're careful what we watch on tv when they're around so they don't see anything that will give them nightmares or make them ask questions that we're not ready to answer. We guard who we let them spend time with so that they're not exposed to bad behavior by other children and  pick up bad habits from them.  We are very aware that little minds are easily manipulated and they absorb things like a sponge.

I don't know what happens, but some where along the line we let our guard down. We loosen the strings so to speak and let them watch a show with us that maybe a year or two ago wouldn't have been allowed. Suddenly, they're listening to music we didn't preview first and give them permission to listen to. We're not nearly as careful about what we say in their presence as we once were. Why do we do this? It's not that they're not watching us anymore, because they are, and when we sit and watch inappropriate shows, or listen to inappropriate music, or say inappropriate things,  now they're sitting next to us doing it with us. I think for me, it's because now, to shelter them from these things, it means I  have to change my choices. Why is it okay for us, but not for them? If it's inappropriate for them, wouldn't it be inappropriate for us as parents as well?

I became aware of this reality the other day as I removed myself from the room when there was a movie on  tv that dropped the occasional F bomb and I was bothered by it enough to leave the room. Yet some where along the line I had decided it was okay for my children to watch that. Granted my 14 year old wasn't in the room, but my almost 19 year old daughter was. Yes she's an adult, but by simply walking out of the room instead of making her turn it off, I condoned what she was watching and gave her the impression that it was acceptable.

I can't help but wonder what other things I've given the impression to my children that they are okay  to do, listen to, say and watch simply because I didn't say it's not okay or because I do it myself. Just because my children are older now doesn't mean they're not impressionable anymore. It doesn't mean they're not watching what I as a parent does anymore. Now I'm faced with a difficult two part task, changing the things that I'm doing, and  telling my children things that once were okay, now are not.